This song I wrote along with the vocalist in an attempt to provide information on how to deprogram the memory out, from behind amnesic walls ; naturally created by the mind as an attempt to protect the core self from having to live with such horrific trauma's.
I will explain the song here in more detail how to use techniques that we found to work.
Do you feel it?
Sometimes the memory’s held behind the amnesic walls seep through, in sensory form. Often this can be a feeling. You may feel something around a situation, place, person, image, word, sound smell and so on. These feelings may reach your attention and may be very unpleasant; in a sense they are indicating that something around you is similar to something you have come across before. Like a perfume you may have once known and associated with something /someone; at a later date the smell reminds you of something but you may have forgotten what, but you sense you know this smell somehow. What you previously associated it with may be sensed /felt as another reminder as to what that perfume means to you.
Hidden memories often leak themselves to you through feelings /senses and things associated with traumatic experiences you have had, serving as triggers e.g. sounds, places, people, colours etc. Some triggers may therefore consequently leave you reliving a nasty experience (may only be in one sensory form e.g. feeling) each time you are reminded.
But from a positive view point these triggers can also be viewed as windows to enter into those hidden memories. By recalling the memory the sensory trigger becomes obsolete; unnecessary to flag as a warning any longer, for now there is full awareness of what the trigger is serving in trying to protect you from.
The vocalist had been traumatised from birth and possibly before, to create these amnesic walls that then could have multiple things hidden behind. Consequently whilst growing up and being used/trained for so many hidden tasks; she without awareness of any hidden trauma felt there were pieces missing from her memory and that her past just didn’t feel right but in learning of MK Ultra, trauma based mind control and through attempting to access those hidden memories she soon had many flash backs coming to her of all kinds of trauma. Like opening Pandora’s Box once you go in through one window to memories other windows start to reveal themselves.
Some played like movie scene in her mind, snippets of events. Memory may come visually but without sound e.g. people speaking but no sound coming out their mouths or it’s muffled. Some times some people may not be clearly recognisable ;like they may appear as a blurry mist ,but if you relax and go deeper into your mind asking for clarity , details on the memory will invariably come. The mist clears the muffled sound becomes comprehendible and those held in mute you can hear.
Each memory that you access will often only be a tiny snippet, snap shot of time in a sense. I believe your mind protects you by giving you the memory you ask for in manageable pieces and once you have somewhat coped with that piece of information it will provide some more. Although this said sometimes some memories seem impossible to access until other parts are revealed, like it has to go in a certain order.
Write to deprogram
The best way to access the memory is to write it down. This we learnt from the writings of Cathy O’Brien and Mark Philips in their book ‘Trance formation of America’. The book is primarily an account of Cathy’s life experience as a mind control slave. Here it is explained that writing demands the use of the left brain and that the sensory memory is stored in the right brain. Therefore by writing down memory one draws the information from the right and communicates it to the left; to enable the writing of. Thus helping to make the incomprehensible senses memory, comprehensible.
Warning
Although I found their book most useful, the vocalist found on reading it, it caused scrambling of her own memory, similarities in their experiences started to become confused so she stopped reading any material on other people’s memories of mind control.
What ever sensory form memory reveals itself in ,start writing on that part and you will very likely find that as you write more aspects of the same experience reveal themselves , like a mist clearing , you will see , smell , hear ,taste , feel those memories that have been frozen and stored . each aspect as you write will come and enhance that already recalled , although sometimes some aspects like a mist for a person , or muffling for words may not reveal themselves at the preliminary stage of a memory being deprogrammed ; it may need to be approached several times before a memory complete in all senses becomes clear.
Speaking can cause abreactions
An abreaction is when the traumatic feelings experienced during a previous trauma emerges in the present and you feel like it is happening now, the emotions are so strong.
When we talk about past traumatic experiences we can go back into that memory and start feeling those feelings again and they can be overwhelming. Emotions are very much part of the right brain function, by writing the memory and therefore using the left brain we by virtue demand the left brain aids us to recall in a detached way. Complete detachment is not achievable but it does reduce it somewhat. Trying to approach it from a third persons perspective also helps detach from the emotions.
There seems to be no need to relive traumatic emotions to heal from trauma, only a need to remember, so you know yourself and also you diminish the effectiveness of triggers /programmes that are used to control you.
Resulting in sovereignty over yourself...
Go on within to the spaces
Once you’ve have a memory ,no matter how small ,by looking into that moment and writing it ,you can get more aspects of it e.g. smell , details like what flooring , who’s there, what time of year . By looking at yourself at those scene; observing your hair style, cloths worn you can often pin that memory to a time, age in your life.
By breathing deeply and calming yourself you can allow space in your mind for the information to become clearer; like you are quite and still enough to listen to what you see/hear.
Rewind time
Once you have got a clear enough picture of a memory you can look to see what happened just before that memory took place.
Everything’s recorded sensory
With trauma based mind control survivors (SRA, DID,MPD,MK Ultra) , the trauma being so extreme the mind switches into I think a high state of alertness , and consequently records the events ,a bit like a video recorder would, in every human sense ,e.g. smell, sight ,sound etc. Although not all memories recalled are traumatic but somehow the hidden memory is recorded as such. Thus when retrieving, it is possible for to access every sensory aspect.
Although some aspects may prove difficult, due to their nature. As a form of protection the mind resists giving the recorded aspect.
It doesn’t matter how long ago the event occurred the recording of remains like one would expect a video tape to remain.
Take it forward
In the same way once you have access to a memory you can look forward past that time to what happens next and so on.
By looking forwards and backwards in time you are able to become aware of the event in context to other things.
Each piece of recorded memory joins to the next and like a jig saw the greater picture starts to reveal itself.
You consequently have insight into your life and you can choose how you conduct yourself accordingly; you are effectively breaking the program.
The matter of false memory so often thrown as a defence to the claims, of many, can also be ironed out by this method of forwards/backwards. For if the memory is false it will not really have a forwards or backwards.
Also sometimes ‘fake’ memory is placed in by programming but using forwards/backwards technique the preceding events can expose the creation process of the ‘fake’ memory.
Ways to enhance the retrieval of memory
Triggers
Sometimes memories may not come at all but if a trigger /reminder is given memories follow.
So by using triggers you can enhance memory recall.
The triggers may be simple things like a certain colour, clothing, smells, places where events took place. By obtaining/ visiting them the memory is much easier to recall.
Some places may be too far away to travel to, like in another country. But to help with this, we have the wonderful scope of the internet search.
Video footage
By searching the places on YouTube you will very likely get video footage which can help enormously.
Also video footage of landing by plane in a country can be useful. For as the landing occurs memories of what comes next often comes to the fore.
Also search for images that may be useful to trigger memory effectively; of cloths, places, venues.
Having the trigger in your possession or being in the place of event
Having the trigger in your possession or being in the place of event is the most effective way to retrieve but images can help.
Through visiting sea side towns that held memory and standing in the sea it was discovered that memory was even further enhanced.
Ideally standing where the event took place.
Video the place when visiting and this can serve to help you deprogram at a later date.
It was found that even memories of other sea side towns came forward whilst standing in the sea.
In fact it was found that if feet were placed in a bowl of water, whilst writing /deprogramming this also helped enhance all memory recall, land or sea.
Clues from others
There are also clues as to where memory may lie given to you along you life’s path by those handling/programming you.
Firstly there is the use of double talk used so much, like sarcasm things said with double meaning. You very likely to remember many a time when people said things to you in a tone that somehow registered as ‘odd’, somehow you stored these statements and these also serve like cues to where memories may lie. You can either brain storm your memories of this or just unravel them as you go along.
Secondly your ‘care’ giver may have taken you on outings, but you know this is odd really considering how they were so horrid to you, why would they want to treat you to a nice day out? Chances are they didn’t and by exploring your memory of the event you may very likely find hidden memories there.
With these methods it becomes possible to open many memory windows into your past.
Pace
But these tools to access hidden memory must be used wisely. For as you open one memory others will often come to you and this can overwhelm you.
Therefore you must pace yourself when deprogramming or the trauma you are recalling may become too much making it difficult to cope with life.
There may be an urgency within you to get it all done, to feel complete ,but you must know this is a very long process ;there is an enormous amount of memory to retrieve and so pacing yourself and finding coping skills is essential.
You must remain as balanced as you can and find ways to balance yourself in life.
I will be writing next on the matter regarding others whom are aware of your triggers and how to address. One Love
